I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
