i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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