Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
