Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
