i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
