Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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