dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
