she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
