White coat. Heels.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
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I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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