oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
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