I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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