he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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