i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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