Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize