walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
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