i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
