Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
