you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
