If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
