Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
