It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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