Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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