A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
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