For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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