you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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