Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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