if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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