he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
