I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
