Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
