I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
