make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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