Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
