i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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