Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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