So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
is that a dick in a sweater?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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