If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize