Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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