I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
