I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
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Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
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And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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