I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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