an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
