He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
