she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Randomize
