we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Two words: blizzard sex
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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