I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
