she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
