I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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