Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
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I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
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he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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