She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
